a meaningless post.

"I told Chris the other night that Phaedrus spent his entire life pursuing a ghost. That was true. The ghost he pursued was the ghost that underlies all of technology, all of modern science, all of Western thought. It was the ghost of rationality itself. I told Chris that he found the ghost and that when he found it he thrashed it good. I think in a figurative sense that is true.The things I hope to bring to light as we go along are some of the things he uncovered. Now the times are such that others may at least find them of value. No one then would see the ghost that Phaedrus pursued, but I think now that more and more people see it, or get glimpses of it in bad moments, a ghost which called itself rationality but whose appearance is that of incoherence and meaninglessness, which causes the most normal of everyday acts to seem slightly mad because of their irrelevance to anything else. This is the ghost of normal everyday assumptions which declares that the ultimate purpose of life, which is to keep alive, is impossible, but that is the ultimate purpose of life anyway, so that great minds struggle to cure diseases so that people may live longer, but only madmen ask why. One lives longer in order that he may live longer. There is no other purpose. That is what the ghost says."

-from Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry into Values, 1974

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Ajna and anjA bring up very valid questions. Surprisingly, my I and me don't have the answers either. Not that you girls were looking for them in Sabrina and anirbaS. But in reading your post, I and me are quite in awe of your self honesty, because I and me aren't quite there. I lie to myself, to me. That I can tell you girls. That I haven't reached a level of self honesty with me that you talk about reaching with your reflection.

And meaning, purpose, doing...the opposite: meaningless, purposelessness, and not doing somehow are the fuel behind the fire, the ying for the yang, i don't know. If everything is meaningful, purposeful, and you are always doing something, what does that mean? how do you know without the opposite?

Maybe my steady stream of meaninglessness jabber is the way I cope with the space between meaningfulness. There is a reason it's a part of me. You, for whatever reason, enjoy my bullshit, we wouldn't have become friends if it didn't exist. I wouldn't write off the little things so quickly Aj and Ja...our happiness (and sadness) lies in the thermal delight of it all.